For this Monday Motivation, I want to motivate people to go ahead and have that awkward and hard conversation you have been meaning to have with your friend, spouse, family member, or co-worker. As someone who typically struggles with confrontation, I am the queen of putting off a hard conversation till the last minute. In an effort to "protect feelings" I have often made situations more intense and uncomfortable then they ever needed to be.
I have found that when I attack an issue head on and "nip it in the bud" there are many benefits that make my relationships stronger and healthier.
I can communicate my thoughts with clarity because I actually fully remember why I am upset. When you wait long periods of time to express your feelings, your thoughts often become muddled with growing frustration. The more time that passes the angrier we tend to get. This elevates the situation rather than de-escalates the situation. This also creates space for you to give the other person a false narrative in your head. This is always unfair to the person and makes having the conversation confusing because of all the narrative you are sifting through.
I am addressing issues as they happen, allowing the person to make corrections along the way, rather than never saying anything and being continually frustrated. If you are upset about a habitual issue you see in your relationship, it is best to share the frustration early rather than allowing yourself to be angry over and over again. A lot of times, people are not perceiving situations as we are perceiving them. They do not know that you are bothered or upset. If you share this with them early, they can make a change and your frustration will be settled quickly and easily.
I am growing in vulnerability and understanding within the relationship. The more effectively you share your frustrations or hurts with others, the more they can understand and love you well. Vulnerability is the key to depth in a relationship. Vulnerability is often born through hard conversations where you are putting your emotions on the line. You will be surprised at how people will respond in compassion and care.