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Writer's pictureKara Holmes

When She Speaks....

I think so often we speak freely without thinking. I actually had in that last sentence “as women” but if the truth be told, we ALL speak too freely and without thinking our thoughts through. I love this verse in Proverbs 31:26, “when she speaks, her words are wise, and she gives instruction with kindness.” NLT


I see within this verse a WHEN and a WHAT and a HOW. We are not called to speak our mind or give our opinion about everything all the time. We have opportunities throughout the day, or circumstances that afford us a chance to be really heard. When we speak too frequently, we run the risk of not being heard. Let me explain, we have all been around someone who talks non stop: they always have an opinion about everything, they always share their ‘two cents’, they walk into a room and immediately jump into a conversation. What usually happens is that we as listeners begin tuning them out. We can use every situation as an opportunity with the Holy Spirit‘s guidance to either speak or not, judging (evaluating) whether what we have to say is of value or helpful to the listener.


WHAT we say should be of value, pertinent, useful, of good report, true, noble, honest, helpful, and virtuous (see Philippians 4:8) full of wisdom and grace. Our words should build each other up, but that’s another blog, LOL


HOW we speak is important as well. The last half of this verse says ”she gives instruction with kindness”. There are times we need to correct, discipline, and instruct. However, there is a way to go about this with love, grace, softness in strength and kindness. Too many times in my life, I have spoken too harshly, yelled, and incorporated more than correction in my correction where my words have not be heard, or been misunderstood, and the listener went away with more hurt and pain than being empowered to change and move forward differently.


We have a great challenge before us to speak correctly but I know that as we learn and practice what God says in His word, He is faithful to use our efforts for His glory. Be blessed today my sisters!

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